When it comes to birth, why do we think we can’t do it? Will it be too hard? Sure, it might be hard, but our bodies were made for this! Will it hurt too much? Might hurt, but it will pass and the hurt will be replaced with a euphoric haze if you go the natural route. It is okay to be scared though. I sure was. And it’s okay to be thinking, . But then I thought about it some more. Birth is natural! Women have been birthing babies big and small for … oh since the beginning of human existence! And moms-to-be of yesterday didn’t have all this mind-numbing, body-losing-feeling, contraction-intensifying drugs to supposedly assist in the birthing process.
Once upon a time, women did it all natural-style, reaping in the rewards of that amazing post-birth loveliness. We shouldn’t fear birth because, in reality, we choose to do torturous things to ourselves in the name of vanity or passion.
Sometimes we even let do medieval-like practices on us … and we walk away with a smile. Let’s think about these things, shall we?
1. Waxing. We wax our eyebrows, our lady beards, ourpubes and back door landing strip, and we are happy and pleased and excited with the result. We even PAY PEOPLE to do it for us. And yet we fear childbirth.
2. Tattoos. Needles. Lots of them. Zeeeeeeeeeee zeeeeeeeee zeeeeeeee into our arms and legs and chest and wrists all in the name of sporting a pretty lotus flower on our arm. And yet we fear childbirth.
3. Anal sex. Um, need I say more? Okay, I will. Anal sex without lube. And yet we fear childbirth.
4. Piercings. Tongue, clitoral, eyebrow, septum, hell even the ears, it’s still a needle penetrating your skin or body part without a numbing agent. And yet we fear childbirth.
5. Wearing four-inch heels. ALL DAY and with a mini skirt and still not showing your panties. And yet we fear childbirth.
6. Shapewear. Ever put a rubber band around your finger really tight and cut off circulation? Shapewear is the same thing. And yet we fear childbirth.
7. Facials. Extractions, chemical peels, sloughing away dead skin, and a person ALL UP IN YOUR FACE. And yet we fear childbirth.
8. Botox. A neurotoxin injected into the face to “cure” wrinkles. Must be up-kept to keep look — meaning injections for the rest of your life. And yet we fear childbirth.
9. Plastic surgery. Fat being sucked out by vacuum, potentially toxic bags of stuff being shoved in, a nip, a tuck … and yet we fear childbirth.
10. Blowjobs. Cough cough. And yet we fear childbirth.
The point here is that these things aren’t exactly, , natural with the exception of 3 and 10, and who are we kidding? Those two are totally unnatural for some.
And yes, medical emergencies during labor or before do happen and make a c-section necessary. It happened to me. So this isn’t about that. This is about how we shouldn’t fear birth! We are made to birth babies, a totally natural and beautiful thing. And it’s a power reserved for women only!
About the author Michele Zipp
is The Stir’s Parenting and Love & Sex Editor. She loves vintage, magic, peonies, superstition, sleuthing, the worst reality shows, and wearing high heels, even at the playground. She’s an AP mom of twins, slightly crunchy but with a pedicure.